Best of 2008

The best of 2008 according to Newt:

Best Book: The Book Thief by Markus Zusak

Best Movie: P.S. I Love You












Best WWC Photos:
Or should I say My favorites:
I couldn't pick just one.
Bright:

From Newt's Muse

Espieglerie

From Newt's Muse

Peek

From WWC Dirty and Peek-a-boo

a-Boo

From WWC Dirty and Peek-a-boo

Best new thing in my life for 2008:

From Newt's Place

From Newt's Place

Though I should say that having my job still at the end of 2008 is pretty incredible as well given the current economy.

Most exciting thing to happen to me in 2008:

MEETING TINK!

Best new food discovery for 2008:

Trader Joes frozen dinner: Gnocchi with Gorgonzola cheese

Best TV show in 2008: Primeval

From Newt's Muse

Favorite shoes for 2008:

From Newt's Muse

Giving Thanks

I am thankful for (in no particular order):

My family
My dad calling me every day just to chat
My love of reading
My job
That I love my job
Having the Hubster in my life
Lily
Caleb
Sophie
Max
Hobbes
Tinker
Cassie
Socs
The shelters that rescued them and let us take them home
Max the bird
My camera that let's me capture those special moments in my life
A roof over our heads
A cabin by the lake
Warm food on the table
Heat in my home
Gas in my car
A car that runs well
The chance to go to Florida
The opportunity to meet Tink
All the Homebloy bloggers out there
The friends I have made from blogging
The Simpsons for always making me laugh
Our friends
Our health
Our happiness
Our contentment

Just Scattered

I have a deadline at work that might kill me

I feel like summer is rapidly approaching its deadline

I haven't seen my front yard in weeks let alone watered it or weeded it

Lord knows if I have any plants left

My house hasn't been cleaned in months

I don't even know where my dining room table is

Rumor has it we own one

For that matter, I'm not sure where any clean underwear are either

There is something in the fridge that smells really bad

But considering there is nothing but condiments in there I don't even know where to start looking

I have several WWC pictures on my computer

Somewhere

For what week I no longer know

I have stuff I would like to blog about

Blogs I would like to read

But deadlines are looming

Like big ugly monsters with giant sharp teeth

If I didn't love my job

I'd be playing in the freeway right now

The children are coming

There is no bed for them to sleep in

Gotta clean

Gotta pick up and put away

Gotta gotta gotta

I must sound scattered

Maybe a little stressed

A little over a month from now I will hit my deadline

Will I coast into it?

Or do a head on at 70?

I guess we will see..................

But also

I have a print out on my desk that tells me that 82 days from now

I can breathe

I can relax

I can spend time with a very good friend

I can meet a very good friend for the very first time

And we can celebrate

Then and Now

Then:

Career: Zoologist, Marine Biologist, Astronomer, Astronaut, Photographer

Car: VW Bug (old school) with rainbows and unicorns painted on it.


Boyfriend: Shaun Cassidy

Food: Peanut butter and Marshmallow goo, oreo cookies, and ice cold milk

Clothing: Geranimals and sneakers

Movie: Star Wars


Book: Harriet the Spy, Little House on the Prairie, Winnie the Pooh

Color: Green

Dream: To hold a Koala Bear

Music: Air Supply, Shaun Cassidy

Now:

Career: Art Historian, Photographer for National Geo, Museum Curator,
Archaeologist, Astronomer, Marine Biologist, Zoologist

Car: 67/68/69 Cherry Red Mustang Convertible, 2008 Cherry Red Mustang Convertible

Boyfriend: Johnny Depp , Gerard Butler

Food: Mama Maria’s in Hudson Wisconsin

Clothing: Jeans that make my butt look good, a top that shows the cleavage, and fabulous high heel’d pumps

Movie: Pirates of the Caribbean

Book: Shantaram, The Book Thief, The Last Days of Summer, In the Electric Mist
with Confederate Dead

Color: Pink

Dream: To see Florence (still would like to hold a Koala bear)

Music: Bruce Springsteen, Classical Music, One Republic, Sarah McLachlan, Enya,
Jesse Cook, Marc Cohn,

Pot.....Kettle........Black

So the hubster and I were out in the backyard on Sunday. And we were discussing how weird our neighbor is. See, our bizarre and annoying neighbor was once again mowing his lawn. Unlike normal people the guy will mow two rows and stop. A couple hours later mow a few more. And then a few hours after that he will mow another couple. We are convinced that chores interfere with his beer drinking. Our fine upstanding neighbor collects unemployment and thanks to the generosity of ourselves and other tax payers we reward his lazy ass with lots and lots of free beer. He then decided to blow up the brand new kiddie pool he bought. Again, thanks to our generosity. Of course, much like mowing, he did it in increments over several hours.

So, as the hubster and I were discussing the oddities of our neighbor, this is what that very same neighbor witnessed on our side of the fence.

Me, with wet hair and a vinyl table cloth wrapped around me.

Hubster, sunglasses and cabana hat cutting my hair.

After doing a fine job on my hair the hubster then decided that the best way to get rid of the pesky hairs still sticking to my back and shoulders was to use the air compressor and blow all the hair off me.

As I titled this post: That would be the pot calling the kettle black. Don't ya know.........

And yes, the hubster does do a fine job with my hair. Honest. It's even on both sides and actually pretty darn cute. Rather than going to the salon and spending 30 bucks + to have her trim less than an inch off my hair I have the hubster do it. Why not? He already colors it. And he does a good job at that.

Brave? Maybe. Cheap? Definitely.

It was a perfect weekend. And I have perfect hair to prove it...............

This and That

Dreamt This:

A football player that I liked and respected was going to quit and had disapeared. I can only assume he was with the Colts as Dungy was in the dream as well. Anywhoodle, I was out with my boss at an outdoor shopping center getting coffee when I spotted him in the crowd. I then proceeded to beg and plead with him to come back to football. He told me to leave him alone and started to walk away. So I did what anyone would have done, I tackled him. So there I am hitting the pavement with a very large linebacker using me as cushioning from the ground. And I still managed to squeek out all the reasons he should be back in football. Something about me being a vikings fan but that I was also a fan of his. Blah blah blah. And that when Tony came into the picture and joined me in trying to convince him to play.

So apparently we succeeded because then I was on the team bus traveling around. And I was leaning on his knee as we were looking out at some local landmark.

And despite the sound of it there was nothing sexual about it. I mean, he was all muscle, big, lean, and beautiful but it stopped there. Don't ask me. I woke up a little disapointed that my dream was so innocent. Oh well.

When I went up to bed the hubster was watching a football game on ESPN classic. So that must be where this all came from. And my friend that just visited lives in Indy.

***

Thinking That:

On the drive into work I heard this song:

I went to a Hooters concert in 86 or 87 at Hershey Park. It was a really fun concert. Night time, lot's of open space. Thousands of people dancing and having a great time. Much like in the video. Just lots of people with big hair having a total blast. This has always been a big feel good song for me. Love the Hooters.

***

Doing This:

Yesterday was another perfect weather day. As soon as I got home from work the dogs and I played in the yard. Then I curled up in a chair and read. The windchimes were quietly singing away, the breeze was softly blowing. The dogs stretched out on the porch and slept in the sun.

Took this: (Courtesy of the Muttprincess)

You Are 24% Evil

A bit of evil lurks in your heart, but you hide it well. In some ways, you are the most dangerous kind of evil.

How Evil Are You?

The Muttprincess has promised to help corrupt me more. Phew, I'm relieved. I don't like being so little evil.

However, I do have a bone to pick with the survey:

SO, let me get this straight. I am evil because: I don't believe in God and or I hate kids.

Seriously?

SERIOUSLY?????

Excuse me, but the historic records prove that the most violent attrocities were committed in the name of God. HELLO people. I think there is some potential evil in the whole belief in God thing there. Regardless of where you stand we can't deny that great evils were committed in the name of religion.

And have you ever tried to relax in your backyard, read a book, listen to windchimes, even nap in the warm sun and had the moment completely destroyed by the screaming hyena of a child next door.

Or those nice dinners at a restraunt completely ruined by either A. the child jumping up and down on the booth seat behind you, or B. the screaming banchee throwing a fit and spitting out peas?

Please, we all hate kids once in a while.

WWC and Speaking of shoes............

So, Dianne asked if these were my reading on the couch with Lily shoes. And now that it is spring they will be on my feet a lot. These little sneakers I picked up last year because of the cute gold/pink, floral patches all over them. Not to mention they are hella comfy.

But I digress. I actually always wear sneakers, winter boots, flip flops, or whatever is comfy to work. I don't wear my spectacular shoe collection to or from work. I always change my shoes when I get to my desk. I do this for a few reasons. 1. I don't get my dress shoes wet, muddy or snowy that way. 2. It cuts down on the discomfort pumps can cause. 3. I tend to bend/twist, destroy my ankles less if I don't have to traverse parking lots, cobble stones, and grass.

Anywhoodle. Life is good. They are telling us we might hit 70 today. I plan to be outside as much as possible.

The temps go back down after today - sigh................

But, the good news is, the tulips are peaking out. As are the daffodils. And our big maple is starting to bud. It's a spring showing tree, so we get these yellow/green flower like things on it in spring. It's not impressive in fall. But spring, it's just a beautiful tree.

And, for those that asked, Nature of Monsters is good so far. But a little uncomfortable. I am worried about where the story will go. The monsters in the book are 18th century men. Not monster monsters. But according to reviews it is a beautiful book. Well written, historically researched, and very vivid in the telling. So far so good. Though I hate reading about scientific research during that time since so many cruelties were committed against dogs, cats, farm animals, and even humans all in the name of "science". I often find it hard to stomach the thought that it was acceptable to do the things they did. And being the sensitive animal lover I am, well, I don't do very well when I have to read about it.

But, I'll let ya'll know how it turns out in the end.

WWC

Background

You almost don't notice the chainlink fence in the background

Close-up

I love to take photographs of flowers close-up

31 Things

1. Hubster and I got in a big fight
2. It’s ok now, I let him know we needed gas in the car
3. He said that’s why he loves me
4. Don’t ask
5. Long story
6. I’m typing this in the car
7. Waiting for the hubster to get out of a meeting
8. It’s warm and sunny out
9. Well relatively speaking since there is still 8 inches of snow on the ground
10. Damn does my mocha taste good
11. Well, now I am in his office
12. And he liked the latte I brought him
13. My jewelry is amber and silver
14. Doesn’t go with much but I like the warm feel of amber
15. My friend is coming to visit at the end of the month
16. I can’t wait
17. I think this will be the fourth time we will have spent time together in person
18. We’ve known each other for over 10 years
19. I think of him as my other soul mate
20. And the hubster is ok with that – he’s glad I have a friend like him
21. I finished the spring poop scoop
22. Now it’s just regular maintenance23. Though the recent snow is going to set me back a bit again
24. But from here on out it’s just cleaning up the new stuff
25. If we re-do our back yard this year as planned they will get a much smaller area of the yard in which to do their thing
26. We want to make a little over half the back yard a living space
27. And then the other half will be just a lawn area for the dogs
28. But that means we can have dinner and parties in the backyard and not worry about where we step
29. That’s gonna be nice
30. Our garage doors were frozen shut this morning
31. When is it going to really be spring????
32. I should stop now
33. But I’m on a roll
34. Actually I brought a roll to go with my spaghetti O’s.
35. OK, I’ll stop now.

Put on those BLue Suede Shoes and Listen for a change

So, be honest now, how many of you have had this kind of conversation?

Airport Security: "Oh, California eh? Nice to get out of the cold for a while.."

Newt: "It sure will be."

Airport Security: "Ok, well, you just need to keep out your boarding pass for the security line you can put your license away. Have a great flight."

Newt: "Yeah, you too."

I have become SO lazy in my listening skills. In my courtesy skills. And in putting some thought into what comes out of my mouth.

I hang my head in shame.

It's not a hard thing to do. Just slow down a bit. Actually listen. And actually put some thought into what we will say next.

Why don't I listen? I mean REALLY listen?

So, that folks is my new goal. I'm going to work on my listening skills. And I'm going to take an extra split second or three to formulate a truly polite and truly sincere courtesy response.

Cause right now, I'm a slacker and it's gotta stop.

***

OH OH OH - on a totally different topic.

We brought the girls home last night that will be staying with us. They walked into the house and got through the ENTIRE night without Caleb or Lily fear barking.

AND THEN - when their mom came to get them this morning there was complete silence in my house. Kelley actually got in the door. And even got to pet Lily. And not one peep, not one bark.

I can't begin to tell you how good that made me feel.

Puppies are making progress. Big progress. I was so proud of them I could've burst.

Friday Quickie

Ahhh, home sweet home.

The best part about coming home: Hubster, happy pups, and our bed. I love our bed. I hadn't slept well all week. But last night, I was dead to the world.

The other cool part about homecoming: 40 degrees or so. I actually sat outside at the airport while I waited for Hubster. It was glorious. A little on the cold side, but glorious none the less. I sat on the rock bump (should have taken a picture) and read till he came.

The only complaint was having to smell this while I waited. Gross!












My last meal in California:

I did get way way too close to loosing that tasty burger on the plane ride. (TMI!) It was a rough ride as soon as we began our descent and till after we landed. I was green and not happy. The only thing that kept me from grabbing ye ol' blue bag in the seat pocket in front of me was the two cuties I was sitting next to. No way was I going to loose it next to Abercrombe and Hollister. HELL NO!

I do have my old lady pride ya know.

Last thing I need to have go out on the pool boy rumor mill is that I get airsick.

It will make it that much more expensive to find one when I am good and ready to have one.

WWC and The Answers from the Realm of Newt

Triangle

Envy

I know you envy me for my cute sheep slippers

And this is at the Cupcake coffee shop. Any ideas why they would put the leg of a doll on the counter?

There once was an internet princess named Newt. She lived in the kingdom of Camelog with many wonderful people. One day there was a terrible storm, it was so cold and windy that the people all gathered together in the great hall. The good King Jay saw to it that a great fire was built in the hearth. And all the lords and ladies gathered round to share stories and mead.

After many pints of mead and many stories the great Jester REH challenged everyone in the kingdom to ask him questions that he would answer truthfully and honestly. And if he dared to not answer the good King Jay made sure that the armory doors were open to all. Oh, that night our darling Jester REH answered them all.

And then, in her tipsy slovenly, yet cute way the princess Newt scrambled up on the table and said,

"My Turn, My Turn ask me, only, you can't use the pointy thingys to get me to answer you."

*hiccup*

"Instead, I'll let you take a pair of shoes away," she says as she sways dangerously on the table, "and you all know" *hiccup* "how important the shoeses are to me"

"So ask away"

And the first to shout out questions was the princess Kell:

"If you could go back in time, what time period would you go to and who would you want to meet there?"

"Well," says the still swaying Newt, "I would go back to the Renaissance period and I would want to meet Michelangelo - and if I lucked out his sometimes friend and sometimes rival Leonardo would be with him." *hiccup* "and I'm not talking about that pathetic boat boy, I'm talking about the real Leonardo!"

but the good princess is not done, she has more questions to toss out to the dangerously swaying Newt:

"If there, heaven forbid, was some disaster and you could only grab 2 pairs of shoes, which 2 would grab?"

The princess stares at Kell horrified,

"Just two? Just two? Oh my gosh, oh my goodness, my kingdom for more than two."

At this, the princess plops down on the table, much to everyone's relief

"Well, if I had to just pick two, I would pick my black pumps with the flowers painted on them and I would probably pick the black and pink Mudd sandals that I live in in summer. That way I cover the comfort and the stunning good looks."

Now that the princess is in a much safer sitting and swaying position the lady Kell feels safe to ask yet one more:

"What was your favorite date with your hubby?"

The princess blushes at this question. She turns redder than she was before. And she says,

"Oh, that would have to be our first official date. We went to the kingdom of San Francisco after my coach picked him up at the air balloon station. We ate at my favorite tavern, Calzones and then had coffee and dessert at the Italian coffee house across the street. We danced in the street with the street musicians, and then headed back to the bed and breakfast inn he had surprised me with earlier. Not only was it perfect in every sense of the word as far as dates go, but also, this huge spark had ignited between us the first time we met. And a couple weeks later for our second meeting it was amazing to know that the spark was still red hot and real."

The lovely princess Kell seems content and a little too buzzed to ask another question so the good King Jay bellows out his questions:

"What is the best book you've ever read?"

The good princess smiles and says: "That would have to be In the Electric Mist with Confederate Dead by James Lee Burke. That was the book that started my romance with the author and his amazing characters and writing."

"But" the princess says as she takes another swig of Mead, "But, I have very fond memories of A Separate Peace because it was the first time I learned that books could move your soul. And that was an amazing moment and probably when I fell completely and totally in love with reading."

The good King seem satisfied with the answer and just as the princess takes another sip of mead he bellows out his next question:

"What is the best movie you've ever seen"

The princess looks perplexed, but then the good Jester REH whispers in her ear "He means moving pictures"

"Oh," the princess giggles "That would have to be Star Wars."



The king sits back quiet and content, his queen upon his knee, and beckons to his loyal advisor and barrister Karen

She oh so elegantly puts down her tankard of mead and asks the princess:

"How did you meet your husband?"

Princess Newt blushes deeply, giggles, sways, and says:

"Well, we met at a wedding in the Kingdom of Vegas. For you see, I had traveled with my Lady in Waiting from my homeland of California. And he, my darling prince, along with his freind and armorer Boy J had ridden from the frozen land known as Minnesota. After the wedding ceremony we spent the night exploring the villages around Vegas. He was kind to me, his eyes were twinkling in the moon light, and I knew that some day he would be my prince truly."

The beautiful barrister is not quite finished, one more question while she waits for her tankard of mead to be filled:

"Are you planning another tattoo? Of what and where?"

The princess leans closely toward the barrister, she looks around conspiratorially, and then whispers (rather loudly mind you, she is drunk)

"Well, I was just telling my darling prince that I think I am done getting inked, but he told me that you can never have too much ink. And, he's probably right. But for now I have no inspirations or ideas so I have to say that I am done."

Newt giggles some more and leans closer to the barrister

"But, if I had to get one tomorrow, I would have a daisy put along my bikini line."

Newt then giggles uncontrollably almost rolling off the table.

As Princess Newt is giggling, the lovely tavern owner Christy brings the barrister her mead and asks the princess:

"Did you ever have a vivid dream that when you woke up you thought it really happened? What was it?"

"Oh my gosh," says the princess, "I once had a dream that when I woke up I truly and deeply wished it were real."

And the Princess straightens her gown and sits up a little straighter and continues:

"It was very strange, the world had actually blown up, but I was with a group of children as well as a young man my same age. For whatever reason we were safe in a furniture store. When the world had finished exploding all of us climbed on the roof of the store and looked out at the most brilliant sunrise I have ever seen. And the wind was softly blowing our hair, the young guy took my hand and we stood there, with the children, and we knew that everything was going to be all right."

(author note, ok, now, I know that seems very strange, and you are probably wondering why I wished it were true, but while I was dreaming, it was the most peaceful, beautiful feeling. I cant really describe it. But I was almost crying when I woke up to discover it wasn't real)

The beautiful tavern owner slides the mead a little farther away from the princess and, though shaken, asks another question:

"And what do you mean they drive on the shoulder?"

The princess looks around for her mead, shrugs, and then says, "Well, it's the strangest thing, they don't have turn lanes, so you use the shoulder when you need to turn your carriage onto a road on the right. But apparently in the kingdom of Austin that translates to a third lane for the entire trip. And not only that, but we watched several carriages then use the dirt as another lane. So, you have people driving their coaches in the two normal lanes, the shoulder, and in the dirt, it is a very very strange kingdom, you would think they would fear getting the carriage stuck in the ruts or worse, get a cactus thorn in their horses hoof"

Seemingly satisfied the beautiful tavern keeper Christy heads off to pour some more mead. The Princess Newt finally spots her tankard hidden behind the oil lamp and takes a deep drink.

The next question comes from the King of the Dessert, King Joel. He asks the princess:

"Well, How many Countries you've visited and which do you like the best? "

The princess blushes, "Well, my good King, I have not traveled to many distant lands. But I have been to the lands called Canada, Mexico, and Germany. All of which I loved but for completely different reasons. I hope to add Belgium and even maybe Italy to my list before the end of the year. My great dream is to see the kingdom of Florence in the land of Italy. And the prince and I plan to spend our tenth anniversary in the land called New Zealand."

The Good King Joel bows regally and thanks the lady for her answer.

The next question is shouted by Mike from the kitchen, he is the Princesses good friend and cohort, as well as maker of many luscious meals:

"If you had to pick one author or actor to accompany you on a cross country road trip, who would it be?"

The princess looks slightly stumped and stalls by slugging back the rest of the mead then looking around for a fresh and full pint.

She staggers from place to place till she suddenly spys an unguarded tankard of mead, snatches it up and then goes back to her spot on the table.

"Well, cooky, I guess if I could travel cross country with anyone it would have to be Nigella Lawson. She's funny, she loves to eat, and she's just girly girl enough to be a blast but not high maintenance. So I know that we would have a great time, she would stop and eat at all kinds of quirky places with me, and I know she would be game for finding the best truck stop pie in the country."

But of course Mike isn't done, he has another question to shout from the kitchen and what else would the cook ask?

"What is your all-time favorite food?"

While contemplating answering "Mead silly", the princess looks up and finally says: "Well, I guess that would have to be Hamburger, shake and fries."

Newt thought that would make Mike go back to the kitchen in horror and disappointment but he still had one more question:

"is there any song or movie that you secretly love, but would be embarrassed for us to find out? What is it?"

Newt looks around, takes a deep drink, and says: "I would do anything for love by Meatloaf." and then the princess looks at everyone, their eyes glassy, their smiles lopsided, and she hopes and prays that no one remembers that she just said that.

And then, because he is so good at distraction and making people forget the horrors of life, or in this case, confessions, the good Jester REH steps up on the table, does a flip in the air, lands on his hands, and starts to juggle empty tankards with his feet, all the time rattling off questions to the princess:

"Blond, Brunette or Redhead?"

Princess Newt, watching, head bobbing to the rhythm of his feet answers quickly:

"Tall DARK and handsome"

"What is the best thing about where you live?"

"The quality of life"

"What is the worst thing about where you live?"

"The fact that it was 30 below this morning with wind chills toward -45"

"Will you be my blogger princess?"

At this the princess seems to snap out of the hypnotic movement of his juggling, she looks at the sweet Jester, and whispers "Yes, of course I'll be your blogger princess"

And the tankards go higher, and faster, and faster, and
higher........................

And several people start to play instruments, and music fills the air, and the ever beautiful and charming Lady Tory steps daintily up on a chair and says:

"What person, living or dead, would you most like to have a conversation with?"

The princess frowns and thinks deeply for a moment, and finally says: "God because it would either be the most interesting conversation in the history of conversations or dead silence."

And then, in her beautiful voice she asks:

"What would you consider to be your 'life motto'? or words to live by."

Two deep swigs of Mead and a few moments of thought lead the princess to say this: "42"

and after she can hear crickets because even the musicians are so confused they stopped playing, she says:

"Ok, ok, how about this: Always give your significant other a kiss and say I love you before either of you have to leave. Even if all they are going to do is go out and mow the lawn."

With that answer the crowd seems happy again, the music starts back up, and the lady Tory continues her questions.

"Hubster - boxers or briefs??"

Princess Newt blushes deeper than ever and says, quietly "Briefs, but he drives me crazy when he wears boxer briefs."

and the lady asks another question:

"Happiest moment?"

Newt takes a deep breath and says, with a big smile on her face: "My wedding day."

and the lady still has more:

"Saddest moment?"

Newt drinks a little more mead, slumps a little, and says:

"When my Aunt called to tell me my Uncle had a heart attack. It was the first time in my life I was faced with the idea that my family wasn't immortal."

(author note: my uncle was ok, but it was a definitive moment in my life and I was forced to deal for the first time with the idea that some day, those I love most in this world will die.)

Though the crowd has become more somber, the Lady Tory, as she is so well known to do, brings the mood back up with another question:

"Shoes or Hubster, you can only pick one! (I know, I'm mean today!!)"

Princess Newt looks down at her beautiful red plaid peek-a-boo shoes that she loves so much, and then over at her charming Prince Hubster who is arguing with the village idiot and then looks back at her beautiful shoes, and then at the prince again, as he swears up a storm over the value of currency, and then back at her shoes, and then back at the prince as he continues to argue with the doorpost now that the village idiot has run away, and she contemplates.

And she looks up at the good Lady Tory and finally answers:

"The hubster"

And then Princess Newt takes a long deep drink.........................

And then, the great chef Mike comes out with a huge platter of pork roast with new potatoes and freshly picked vegetables, and just, to set the mood, he asks one more question of the princess:

"What do you think is the most abject form of human suffering?"

The princess looks at him a little blurry eyed, and thinks for a moment. And then thinks for a few minutes more,

"Hmmm," she says "I would have to say religious and political fanatasism."

And with that she picks off some of the tasty dark spots on the roast and happily chews on the succulent meat.

And then, from a quiet corner steps the armorer, Boy J and he asks the princess:

"Do you obey the law because its the right thing to do, or for fear of being caught?"

The princess, somewhat occupied by some hair that has fallen in her face, blows at her bangs, and then looks at Boy J and says,

"Well, I guess, for the most part, I obey the laws because its the right thing to do. And that's the truth, honest. Can you imagine if everyone thought they had the right of way? Carriages would never move again."

Boy J seems satisfied, he grabs another pint and heads back to his warm, quiet corner.

And then, suddenly, the door opens, and along with cold wind and snow come two women, both dressed in fantastic winter dress. Both, with boots made of a fake fur so soft you want to do nothing but pet them all day. The women are sleek, sexy, and full of confidence.

Princess Newt smiles, stands, and says,

"Welcome, my friends, please come, join us. Has the cold weather shut down even your fair establishment?"

"Well," the lovely shoe whore says, "It was a bit quiet and we heard that there was fun to be had up at the castle, not to mention free mead."

And the great jester REH speaks, "Ladies, we were just asking the princess questions, questions about anything, go ahead, ask her."

The shoe whore gets a wicked smile on her face.

"Well, then, tell us, did you ever get any?"

And the princess blushes, and says, "well, as a matter of fact, this very morning."

The shoe whore smiles and then asks:

"Who's your bestest friend in the whole wide world?"

And the princess says, without hesitation: "The hubster. " "But as for girlfriends, that would be BFFM."

And then Newt winks at the shoe whore.

But the shoe whore has one more as she pulls from under her cape a tiny black creature.

"Will you take the spawn from 2/26 - 3/1?"

The princess starts to pout, "I can't, I'm going to be in the kingdom of Austin. I'm sorry"

And then, steps forward the beautiful and feisty Tink. She looks around the room and gets a devilish grin on her face,

"What kind of underwear are you wearing right this very moment?"

The princess, now quite drunk says, "I don't know, why don't you check and see"

And with that she flips up her skirts to reveal a sexy black thong from VS.

And several of the revelers run screaming from the room with the words "My Eyes! MY Eyes!" echoing in their wake.

Princess Newt shrugs, straightens her skirts and looks at Tink.

"What's your strangest habit?"

Newt has to ponder for a while on this one. And after several sips of mead finally answers:

"Well, I chew on my lip a lot. And I can't go to sleep unless the closet door is closed, you know, closet monsters."

Tink doesn't seem very impressed so she asks one more question:

"If you could jump into a hobby and be perfect at it right away, what hobby would you choose?"

"Oh, that's easy, I would play the Oboe."

And with that final answer the room grows quiet.

"Well," Newt says, "who wants to be next?"

Confessions of a geek

I'm a geek. There is no way around it. And I'm ok with that. Geekdom, frankly, is a pretty good place to be. The people are nice, well, at least the "normal" ones are. There are a few geeks that go overboard and get kinda scary but we try to avoid those.

I love SciFi. In fact it's gotten to the point that I either watch Sci Fi or a show that stars two huge geeks, Mythbusters.

I read Sci Fi. Though I also read a wide variety of books my favorites are in the geek category.

Except James Lee Burke, and he's on a pedestal all by himself way up high in my world.

I relate to geeks, I'm comfortable with geeks, I get them and they get me.

I'm not just left of center, I'm left of reality.

I have a vivid imagination.

At night my dreams take me to some very odd places normally reserved for drug induced psychosis.

I got to thinking about my geekdom when it dawned on me that I really don't watch any television unless it involves outer space or the mythical.

And a happy Saturday was spent deep in the world of Neverwinter. Actually I finished off the game this evening so I went on to Amazon and ordered the other two expansion packs. I've grown very attached to my little monk. She kicks some serious ass. And the little kobold bard that hangs out with her, well, I wouldn't know what to do without him. Grant you he gets himself killed more often than not as soon as a bad guy looks at him sideways but he's funny and kinda cute in a "he's so ugly he's cute" sort of way.

I will not reveal all my geeky ways. I won't make you suffer through them. And a few are just my little secret. Those things about me you might never know.

But we all have to have our secrets right?

Any besides, it keeps me out of trouble. And really, that's all that matters.

So what are you? Jock? Geek? Nerd? Cheerleader? Druggy? Thespian?

A Quickie

Monday is the big day. I'm so nervous and excited and just a bundle of butterflies. They called Friday afternoon. I was just praying their weren't taking back their offer. They just wanted to make sure I was still planning on joining them.

Got my hairs cut - went for the same sassy but easy to handle short hair

Hubster will be coloring the hair in a few moments. I've chosen a bronzed brunette color whatever that might be.

I have my 2 forms of ID ready.

My paperwork originals they told me to bring.

Map to get from Corp. office to my regular location as I have to visit both.

Outfit picked out. A fabulous autumn number with browns, golds, and reds in the top. Should accent the bronzed brunette color quite nicely.

Shoes, fun yet practical since I'll probably get a tour etc. I can't wear the sexy but unwalkable shoes.

I even have a nice business bag to carry it all in so I look professional yet hip and stylish.

First impressions do count. I'll wait till Wed. or so to shock them with my true Bright Goth tattooed white trash self. :-)

Wish me luck. I'll let you know how it goes Monday night.

Newt on the Loose Day 4

Lily starts barking

The coffee pot brewing sets her off

I have to change the timing. 5:45 apparently comes sooner downstairs than it does upstairs. So I wake to frantic puppy barking rather than Mozart.

The alarm clock goes off - can't ignore the puppy barking anymore

I know, bad mom

I wish I could capture the image of the puppy pile that heads out the door. It is literally one scrambling mass of fur, legs, and wagging tails. They have no patience to exit in a nice orderly fashion, simply scrambling over, under and on top of each other is better.

A relatively uneventful day

Miss the hubster

He's meeting up with his best friend Willy for dinner

I went to Mall of America to see if they still had something I wanted to send to a friend.

Yippee, they did.

Also stopped in Mac and picked up a new blush since the old one is down to two tiny little flakes.
"Blushbaby" is my color. I also picked up one of their bottles of pigment. I think as far as make-up goes these are a fantastic deal. They cost less than 20 bucks and you get so much of it that I doubt you could use it up in 10 years. And you can use it with lip gloss, on your eyes, or on your cheeks. It's a concentrated loose powder. I picked up "Rose" but I also liked their limited edition "Revved-up". The clerk was fabulous though and gave me a small sample of it to try. Small as in, probably a years worth. Bless her heart. They also have this fabulous eyeshadow stick. It's waterproof. You can wear it alone or as a base for powder eye shadow. It keeps the powder on your eye and enhances the color. It is one of the best products ever. I have "Beige-ing" which is very neutral and perfect for a shadow base.

Then on to target. Yep, went back to my favorite black hole. I decided that I wanted to make my favorite meal that I can only eat when the hubster is out of town so for that I needed cauliflower. I steam some cauliflower and mix it into a bowl of Velveeta shells and cheese and I am in heaven.

Finally home I vegged out with the pups on the couch. "While you were sleeping" was on so I caught the last 45 minutes. And of course, I cried. Even more than usual this time because the hubster is gone.

Then I flipped to the last hour or so of "The Truth about Cats and Dogs" and yes, I cried.

I guess if I want to complete the usual chick flick marathon I should pop in "Bridgett Jones" tonight, or "Someone Like You". Those are always good for a cry. Or "Two Weeks Notice" or "Notting Hill"

Then it was off to bed.

Cell phone in hand I hit the sack.

The hubster promised to call even though it would be late.

11:30 it finally rings.

Newt: "Hi Honey"
Hubster: "Hi Baby, I'm still hanging out with Willy"
Newt: "Cool, did you give him a hug from me?"
Hubster: "Yep, as soon as I saw him."
Hubster: "Just walked right up and gave him a hug"
Willy: "Uh, glad to see you too Hubster"
Hubster: "That was from Newt"
Willy: "Oh, well, in that case."

Then after the usual "I love you" "I love you too" "Goodnight" "Goodnight" "Ok, sweet dreams" etc etc etc we hung up.

And Newt drifted off to sleep.

Newt on the Loose Day 2

Sophie the bed hog and I got up with the alarm.

Alarms suck.

We stumbled down the stairs, let out the frantic, insane, and barking their fool heads off puppies. Which, by the way do flips in their kennel while they wait for me to let them out.

One big dog pile stumbles out the back door and heads for the grass to do their thing.

Four screaming cats ran frantically to their bowls for breakfast.

The coffee is brewing.

I bow to the coffee gods.

Is there a coffee god.................

Pause while I google............................

(Nice elevator music plays)

And here are the websites to pick from:

Welcome to God's Coffee - God's Coffee™ offers your congregation the opportunity to enjoy delicious, fresh roasted, gourmet coffee and support your church's worthy cause

God Drinks Coffee: A Freshly-Brewed View on Prayer

The Temple of the Gods of Coffee - Welcome Oh worshipers of the Goddess Caffeina and her consort Juan Valdez

God's Communist Coffee - Product naming and packaging design is a complicated art.

Coffee with God - Christian Spirituality w/Edges - Coffee with God involves good coffee, dark coffee - something with character - Brazilian or Ethiopian or Tuscan, not Folgian. This point may seem irrelevant,.........

Apparently there is no coffee god. But it does have a history.

Anywho, the pups made it as miserably difficult as possible for me to leave in the morning. Being all cute and pathetic looking, wanting to snuggle and get pets. But I, the evil mommy, wrenched myself away from their mind controlling cuteness and went to work.

I got to talk to the hubster and he even sent me an email.

We talked about how we missed each other. Lots.

After work the pups and I had a fun time. We played in the yard, they helped me cook dinner. Which thanks to Kell was Cheesy Jambalaya. Yum..................

Then I finished watching "Stargate". The extended cut was actually pretty good. There was nothing in it that I wished I hadn't seen or detracted from the original's spirit. The theatrical version took out some of the military paranoia and need to shoot things. But having it back in the extended version wasn't too bad.

I had a hard time falling asleep last night. In fact for whatever reason I had just started to doze off when I woke up, heart racing, in sheer panic.

"What if I die?"

"Who will feed my puppies?"

I mean, Sophie and Max can just chow down on my corpse, but Caleb and Lily are locked away.

"Oh god, my heart is racing, is that bad?"

"What am I going to do?"

Then when my sanity returned I realized I'll just email Jer Bear every morning and let him know I am alive. If the emails stop he should go to the house and take care of business. Pretty simple actually.

Problem solved..............well, as long as I make it to work tomorrow in time to email him.....................awwww hell.................well, nothing I can do about it now..............ZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Newt on the Loose Day 1

At 8:15 Sunday morning I kissed the hubster goodbye.

He's off to a class in California. Sigh.................

First stop: Target
Going to do some fall cleaning

After being lost in the vortex that is target for about an hour and 60 bucks the poorer I headed home

Everything bagel for breakfast. Fantastic!

First up: the living room. Sort and put away hubsters magazines and papers.

Dust off piano. Sneeze.

Start vacuuming living room. Chasing after furry dust bunnies bigger than Lily.

Pick up dog bedding and blankets - go outside and shake them out.

Sneeze

Wash doggie stuff.

Sneeze

Shake out entry way carpet. Sneeze.

Pull out jackets I probably won't wear this winter and stick in Space Bag.

Suck the air out - these things are SO damn cool.

Nicely hang up the rest of the coats.

Remove all items from entryway.

Sneeze.

Vacuum and wash floor.

Wow, much better.

Sneeze.

Start removing various living room items, dust, sneeze, repeat.

Dust and wash floors.

Put various items back.

What is that smell?

Pick up DVD's from floor and start to sort and put away.

Oh, god, the smell is worse.

Sniff Spiderman cover.

Don't need spidey sense to figure out Caleb peed on them at some point.

GROSS - EWWWWWWW - GROSS.

Scrub down DVD cases, throw paper covers away. Use cheesy inserts for cover so we know what it is.

Grumble Grumble Grumble

Ok, half of living room scrubbed down. Time for my date with the couch.

Start to watch Stargate - the directors cut.

ZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Paw paw paw in face.

MEOW!

MEOW!

MEOW!

What huh? Alright sheesh, I'll get you some food.

Feed the kitties

Brush teeth

Take some Tylenol PM

Read a little snuggled in bed

WHAM! Book hits nose.

Throw book on nightstand, turn off light. Go to sleep.

Made it through the first 14 hours without hubster.

Caught red handed

Girl J and I discovered one of our guilty pleasures that we never went public about.

We both LOVE Spaghettios. The plain ones, the ones with meatballs, AND the ones with hotdogs. I have never found someone that loved all three like I do.

Yep, she caught me with the can on my desk. I normally turn the label around so that it looks like soup.

Basically I never came out of the closet because I was so tired of people talking about how disgusting they were. While trying to heat/eat them.

I never quite understood why people feel the compulsion to discuss how much they hate a food while someone else is trying to eat that very food.

Sort of like the Twinkie hecklers that used to hang out at the twinkie booth at the fair. And as we were taking our first bite and trying to enjoy our twinkiegasm they felt compelled to loudly comment on how disgusting they were.

So, come out of the closet with Girl J and me, what's your secret guilty food pleasure????

A corny tribute

A have a friend
Goes with me everywhere
keeps my company on the bus
in bed
on the porch, the couch,
in my favorite chair
It doesn't judge me
it just follows me around
it makes me laugh
cry
get angry
get scared
makes me think
makes me dream
and wonder
it introduces me to new people all the time
some of them I like
some of them I love
some of them I don't care for so much
but no matter what, I always feel something
delight
remorse
temptation
joy
sorrow
I can not tell you how thankful I am
to have you in my life
No matter what else is happening
you are there
always
the one sure thing I can depend on
My friend,
My book

A Hidden Talent

Boys and Girls gather round, I want to share with you the wonders of the great and powerful Newt.

She has developed a skill so talented it is mind boggling.

Yes, stranger than fiction, odder than an episode of the twilight zone and crazier than your neighborhood cat lady.

My friends, Newt goes to bed at night. The bed she sleeps in is a queen sized captains bed. It rises 4 feet off the ground and has storage drawers around the base. Like most of you folks Newt has a mattress cover, a fitted sheet, a flat sheet and, weather depending, between 1 and 50 blankets, all neatly arranged on the bed in the usual style.

Well ladies and gents, Newt snuggles down between the sheets, curls up in a little ball and falls quickly asleep.

But sometime in the night the magic occurs.

Folks, Newt somehow manages to crawl between the fitted sheet and mattress pad. She's not sure how she does it. But like magic, when she wakes up she is snug as a bug under the fitted sheet.

That's right ladies and gents, you read that correctly, the lil lady gets herself in quite a pickle. She somehow manages to cast off the blanket and the sheet, pull up the tightly wrapped fitted bottom sheet and crawl under it all without waking up.

And she now realizes why she was so annoyed with the hubster and didn't feel like she had a whole lotta sheet to cover up with. But of course, in her sleepy dreamy state she never wakes up enough to realize the mess she has gotten herself into.

This ain't no tall tale, this is the gosh darn truth.

That little ol' Newt is a talented girl.

Yep, she sure is......................

Newtness is spreading

It's catchy, be careful. You might find yourself looking for cute shoes. Or even clothing for that matter. Last night I was asked to go with a co-worker to DSW to help her find shoes. Cute ones, not the usual black or brown practical shoes she wears.

She left the store with an adorable patten leather dark red/burgundy colored wedge. The kind of color that would go with anything. And she was so excited because it was way out of her box.

Another co-worker was apparently informed by Girl A that I would be a great resource if she needed help shopping. That I am great at helping people find the perfect clothing. For their style, their body type, and their budget.

Wow, who'd have thunk. I always thought of myself as fashionably impaired.

Anyway, it was a wonderful compliment. I was actually quite touched to know that Girl A thought I did a great job helping her find new items for her wardrobe. Such a great job that she spread the word.

Of course, I have a partner in crime. Girl J and I are a team. It's a joint effort. And we probably really should try to make a business out of it. Personal shoppers. Hmmmm has a nice ring to it.