Stranger than Fiction

You can't make this shit up. We get a local little paper every couple of days. And in it they have the police activities:

I decided this latest batch was worth sharing.

Assaults- A 38-year-old employee was getting into her car after leaving work at the S--------- G-------, 411 Farwell Ave., when she was attacked by a woman. Witnesses said the assailant's daughter and cousin joined in the fray.
The suspect reportedly yelled, "You better stay away from my man" before attacking the victim, according to the report.
A security worker helped break up the assault. The victim suffered a bump to her forehead area.
Later on, the suspects allegedly went to the victim's home and broke a bunch of windows.

Assaults - A 10-year-old boy was assaulted by the aunt of a fellow classmate as he was walking home from Lincoln Center Elementary, on Nov. 17. Earlier that day, the victim got into an argument with a classmate (who is a year older than him) in which some minor pushing and shoving occurred.
After school, the boy's 17 year-old aunt drove up to him as he was walking home, questioned him about the assault and then slapped him in the face. A witness drove the boy back to school to report the incident.

Vandalism - A boy threw a hammer through a sleeping 18-year-old girl's bedroom window at a residence on the 400 block of 5th avenue at 9 a.m. Nov. 25th. The girl reportedly knows the suspect, who agreed to pay damages. No charges were pressed.

And saving the best for last:

Disturbances - Neighbors found a toddler wandering on a parking lot on the 1000 block of 8th ave. S at 1:15 a.m. Nov. 22. Upon returning the boy home, officers discovered a 36-year-old male babysitter asleep on the floor, high on meth. His head was in a bowl of noodles.
Police tracked down the boy's mother at a local bar. They later turned over the boy and a 1-year-old girl.
Neighbors reported a similar disturbance not too long ago, in which the boy wandered into the family's garage and became trapped when a door closed behind him. Neighbors heard him crying loudly and called the police.
A report of the latest incident was forwarded to Child Protective Services.

So which part of that story disturbed you the most? Cause Damn!