PFC #1
Brought to you by the amazing, wonderful and fabulous REH!
It was a damn leaf. Of all the stupid things.
My mother said I was easily distracted. I never realized how right she was. Not until it was too late.
I had been doing what all young men do. I had been showing off. There was this girl, she was so beautiful. And she was watching me from the balcony of her home.
She didn't live in a nice place. It was run down, what mom always refers to as an eye sore. But with her standing there, leaning over the balcony rail, she made that building the most beautiful one on all the islands.
I ran from one end of the beach to the other. I jumped over the rocks, I splashed in the water. I was on top of the world.
And then, mid run I spotted a leaf. What a curious thing to find here. There were only palms for miles around. What could a leaf be doing here.
I bent down to marvel. Maybe add it to my collection of things. Snips and snails and puppy dog tails and all that.
With the roar of the waves I never heard him coming. The dune buggy. And he never saw me. He was jumping a ridge of sand. I was bent down low cradling my new found treasure.
Now, I will never know her name. I had hoped she would find me irresistible, I was hoping she would want to get to know me. That playful young man on the beach so full of life and spirit.
I never suspected for a moment that I would leave an imprint on her mind. That sometimes at night she would wake screaming. Screaming for the boy so playful but no longer filled with life.
11 comments:
Short AND sweet.
I really liked it, and you seem to share that same evil streak I have in my writing... yeah I gave my PFC a happy ending - but never get used to that ;)
Well played, and I hope you'll play again next month!
Really good! (I squeezed one more in before I gotta' run). You really captured how it only takes a second, a blink, a half blink to change life and our world entirely.
I remind myself of that daily. I could "see" your story happening.
Wow I love this. I'm amazed at how short you were able to make it! I had no such luck. Excellent job!
Em
I loved the plain talk style of this. Like Farmer's Wife, I could see the story easily. Sad but well done.
So clever...you had me running along like a happy puppy then...face-plant! :) Fantastic story, and eye-opening!
Oh man. Way to be different there! Well done. I agree with Jo. Just happily skipping along and BANG. Good job!
This was a wonderful addition to the PFC!! You did so much with so little, I'm in awe!
Great job!
OMG that was amazing! What a cool and sad twist. You did a fantastic job with those pictures!
I too, took the short story title to heart. You did a great job incorporating all elements of the pics in a compact and entertaining story.
great story newt! I smiled at the first line, get all relaxed, and then smacked in the gut.
so much in so few words - brillant.
Narrate this and put up a podcast, fake some kind of cool British accent. Yeah. That would rock.
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